So when is two wrongs a right? Geesh be an adult and smart about this.
How else am I supposed to keep myself from falling apart? You expect me to be withered down and crying everyday? I need to put up a facade in order to continue my daily rountine, You seem to aspire to call me out with words like fake and dishonest, I am not those things but you won’t ever see that, You continue to cling to the past, reliving it everyday. I am no relic from the Past. I...
ENOUGH! I’ve had it. No more being so depressed, I need to start changing…and that means ME first. So let’s put a smile on that face….yes think of the Joker when I say that. I’m gonna try and smile more even though it hurts me.
I never thought it would get this far, I mean …when you love someone, you don’t hurt them right? Am I right…? Bruises and Blood never look good on a girl.
Feeling like…AHH. Love is a cursed feeling. It never leaves you and it breaks you slowly. Quien sabia eso? Yo lo sabia pero no me paro.
So I spent close to 30 minutes crying my eyes out into a towel. I’m miserable. Just miserable.
So today they cut my cable, I can’t really afford it. Well I can but I need to start saving money so I only have super high speed internet now. *wahhh* I have to watch my Jersey Shore and Bad Girls online now but I can download a ton of stuff hella quick. Anyways job interview went well but I don’t want it. It’s a commission based job and what they sell isn’t something...
So today I have some interview for a job at 4pm. I know weird huh? It’s more like an organization of some sorts but they pay. I need help with bills so doing this without my mom knowing. Anyway it’s 7:25am and I have class at 9am. I need to do some homework. I came back real tired from last night’s dinner with some GRL girls. I managed to do the first page but fell asleep right...
What am I fighting for again? I think I might have been stopped in my tracks last night. I went out last night, not a good idea but whatever. It’s 7:40am. I have my midterm at 9am. @.@ Last night was …alright but shit ALWAYS happens. *sigh* Can someone just come into my life and make me smile. I’m not looking for a lover or anything just someone who can reignite my soul. Hell...
I have two Spanish midterms in the next 24 hours. My Spanish 201 is in two hours. My Spanish 211 is tomorrow at 9am. I plan to party tonight. Let’s see how good my young genes can handle it. I plan to look good tonight but only for myself. I never go out with the mentality to meet anyone. I prefer to just dance and drink. I don’t need anyone to make me happy tonight besides the ice...
So I thought occurred a while ago. See I know people like me but hell…I don’t like them. So squish that attempt in ever gaining anything from me aside from friendship. See all I’ve been wanting lately has been a kiss. Not no damn peck or baby kiss, I mean a genuine kiss—and not from just any random stranger. Hell if I had my way the only person I’d be kissing would be...
It’s 1:23am and I feel awful. I threw up everything I ate today and I feel hella bloated. My stomach is evil. I have a midterm at 11:00am. I need sleep but it won’t let me. It keeps making these strange sounds. Geesh I know Moka is keeping me company but ugh…help. :’(
Can I get a hug? or least some form of acceptance? *sad lurker* :’(
So my posts lately have been the least to say depressingly sad and my apologizes. I don’t have anything happy going on in my life right now. Nobody who makes me smile anymore so …let’s be honest about it. I’m gonna go running. I feel I’ve been laying in home crying and being lazy for too long. I need to least look sexy being depressed, right? Write later.
Crying is becoming a chore everyday now.
So I really want a Nintendo DSi system with Pokemon White. Mmk???
As I sit here clenching a pillow and crying my eyes out I wonder…”What happened to the most awesomest person ever?” She’s gone. My eyes ache and I’m just so exhausted now.
So I’m boiling milk to make Mexican hot chocolate so I can add it to a smoothie I’m about to make because that’s how I roll. The weather sucks today, light showers all day. I went to Bourbon’s last night, met up with my sorority sisters, which was new. I haven’t been there in over a month. I tend to stay awake from clubs during school…or least I try to now. ...
I’m sad. Okay? Mmk.
I have a Spanish oral presentation in an hour. I’ve chosen….Pitbull! I can’t find note cards, like WTF? I use to have a lot of those and Gawd only knows where they are hidden now. I’m pretty sure I have a paper due today for RWS but I have no idea which one and if it truly is? My ISCOR class was fun on Monday I hope she keeps it up. I love doing simulations on international...
Sometimes it just ain’t worth it. I despise it all right now.
So now that we’re older…time flies by faster. UGH! I don’t want to be 22. I’m already 21. That’s old enough. lol
I’m over the past. I’ve already owned up to my mistakes and have chosen to look forward rather than back but when someone is constantly reminding you of your past mistakes it’s not easy to easily forgive yourself. It’s funny everyone boasts about letting go and not living in the past and I am trying…she just makes it hard. Anyway I will be alright, I’m just...